Category Archives for "Holistic Coaching & Healing"

How to Have an Attractive Personality and Be a Successful Person

Turn up your speaker and


 

Why have an attractive personality? Well there are many reasons. Not just superficial ones. By being more magnetic, you can accomplish your aims and goals better. If you are attractive, you feel better about yourself.

We are not just talking about physical beauty, ala being a movie star good looks. Everyone can look his or her best.

So this piece is about how to shape yourself into a more attractive person, which leads to becoming a more successful person. Sound good?

Here are some don’t’s for having an attractive personality:

  • in general, avoid being a pleaser
  • trying too hard to fit in and maintain the status quo
  • fear criticism
  • fear rejection

Instead of being a pleaser person, have a pleasing personality. This means you will design your life to be a more attractive and magnetic person, which will help you and others.

Do’s for developing an attractive personality:

  • serve others
  • be genuinely interested in others, rather than trying to be interesting yourself
  • smile and laugh: it stimulates positive hormones
  • appear attractive to create a good impression, including dressing well and having good grooming

In other words, become more aware of yourself and how you affect others. By developing these positive traits and eliminating the negative ones, your life will get so much better.

Go for it.

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The Biggest Energy Drain?

When people are near death what is their most common regret? It’s the regret that they didn’t take opportunities that presented themselves.

“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me,” as caretaker Bronnie Ware observed.

This begins to uncover a mystery: why are so many people without a dream or goal? And further, for those who do have direction, why do they fall short of accomplishing their heart’s desires?

So let’s take a deeper look at a certain gushing energy drain, one which most of us are not even aware of.

Here’s the good news: If you can fix this energy drain, your chances of success and making a contribution can skyrocket!

TOO MUCH “INNER CONSIDERING”

George Gurdjieff, the Armenian sage of the last century, called this limitation “inner considering.” By that he meant our habit of worrying what others may think.

Let’s put things in context. Trying to fit in is normal for teenagers. Being accepted by your peers is a developmental stage.

This trying to fit in doesn’t stop during our teens, however. Adults still spend much fruitless time trying to please others. As if lost in a maze, we are then subject to whatever we are guessing others are thinking or might say about us.

As you become aware of your thoughts, and your desire for a greater life strengthens, a certain truth emerges…

You can’t inner consider others and follow your own guidance. Try to please everyone and just about no one will be satisfied. You’ll lose respect from others and yourself.

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A REVEALING STORY

Phillip once coached a lively woman who had a verbally abusive husband. The relationship came to a head when the husband issued 17 demands to her. In order to stay married to him, she must follow all of them.

In the next counseling session, Phillip figured this was the perfect opportunity for her to leave a difficult marriage, an easy way out.

When he asked her what she was going to do, she quickly replied, “Follow the demands. I could never get a divorce. This is a small community and what would people think if I got divorced?”

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TIME FOR “EXTERNAL CONSIDERING”

Gurdjieff recommended a remedy for inner considering. The solution? To externally consider.

This meant to genuinely serve others, not out of fear and obligation, but sincerely helping when you are guided to serve others.

From this inner-directed place, your service expresses your spirit and can bring out the spirit in others.

ANOTHER REMEDY

Another remedy for worrying about others is EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques).

“Even though I’m worrying what _____ will think, I can still follow my heart and love and accept myself.” Then start tapping…

BECOMING MORE SELF-AWARE

To be willing to dream may take some courage. You need to step out of the crowd and claim a better life for yourself.

Ironically, probably the best chance to genuinely help others is to follow your own bliss and purpose.

In other words, you no longer need to dwell on whatever you imagine others are thinking about you. Instead, just focus on following your higher purpose, which benefits you and others.

Yes, be aware of others. And above all, be self-aware of your own thoughts, feelings and actions. “To thine own self be true,” as Shakespeare advised.

Following this course will lead to a life of fulfillment, without those final regrets of having missed your calling.

Then your actions will more naturally flow from a loving place, regardless of what the neighbors might think.

 

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How to Achieve Your Dreams & Goals: 2 Master Questions

You do want to have a greater, more meaningful life. This means having specific dreams and goals to guide you.

As holistic coaches, we want to share two master questions that will help you to achieve your all-important dreams.

YOU ARE A PATTERN RECOGNIZER

To understand why these two questions are so powerful, first a little neuroscience (brain science). Your brain has the astonishing capacity to recognize billions of patterns. If I say “cute, wagging tail,” it doesn’t take long to picture a dog.

We can complete countless pictures and sentences just by accessing this vast pattern-recognizing ability we have.

You can harness this vast storehouse of patterns at your fingertips to help you realize your dreams and goals.

TWO MASTER QUESTIONS

The first question is, “What will happen if you don’t go for your dreams and goals?”

The second question is, “What will be it like if you do accomplish your dreams and goals?”

The first question elicits negative patterns, the second one elicits positive patterns. Both are equally important to ask, and work hand in hand.

TO ILLUSTRATE

Let’s give two quick examples on now this works on a dream or goal.

Example 1: Say your dream or goal is to have a business or career you love.

1st Question: “What will happen if you don’t go for a business/career you love?”

Possible answers will come pretty readily.

Such as… I’ll feel unsatisfied. I won’t amount to much compared to what I could have. I won’t be able to help myself and others in a meaningful and exciting way.

2nd Question: “What will it be like if you do find a business or career you love?”

Possible answers: I’ll feel fulfilled. I’ll help myself and others in exciting ways. I’ll be making a difference.

Example 2: You want to reach your ideal weight.

1st Question: “What will happen if you stay overweight?”

Possible answers: I’ll keep feeling tired. I’ll look and feel bad. It may lead to illness and disease. I’ll disappoint myself.

2nd Question: “What will be it like if you do attain your ideal weight?”

Possible answers: I’ll feel and look so much better. I will be healthier and inspire others. I’ll be freer to do and wear what I want.

USE THE CARROT & STICK

Use this carrot or stick approach with these two master questions. The stick is the first question about not going forward, and keeping the status quo. The carrot is the second question of imagining the good things that will come with attaining your dreams and goals.

An important note when you do this exercise: make sure to do the first “stick” question. People sometimes avoid that one (about not getting your goals) because it may bring us some momentary discomfort.

Why make sure to ask it? By harnessing your pattern recognition ability, you will get at a deeper level what will happen if you remain where you are.

By identifying negative consequences of staying where you are (unsatisfying job, sluggish body, etc.), you will get a clear picture. This sharper image will motivate you to go forward, especially after answering the second question.

Otherwise if you avoid the first stick question, you might not get over the hump. You are at risk of staying where you are and getting by with the status quo. In effect, it’s better to chase your dreams rather than run from your fears.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Do this powerful simple exercise as soon as possible. If you delay, your settle-for part can stay in control. Asking these two questions shows you something critical about yourself — your aliveness.

How alive are you with your dreams? How alive are you without your dreams? It’s a big difference.

So be brave and go for it. Ask these two master questions and you might be surprised at what you will learn. It’s time to accomplish your goals.

Fulfilling your dreams will be that much easier…. and life can be so much better!

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How to Feel Good Now (Law of Attraction Tips)

Turn on your speakers to watch the video below.

Why is it so important to feel good? We often don’t even feel when someone asks how we are feeling. Yet, surprisingly, it’s one of the most important things you can do: feel as good as you can, in each moment.

Why? Positive feelings raise your vibration. So they attract and create what you want. If you are more productive and creative that means you are helping yourself and others.

You can only feel better than you do now, which may not be great depending on your state. But you can always feel better.

The idea is to focus your thought to uplift your feelings. It’s a lifelong meditation. You must be mindful of how you think and the feelings generated.

POSITIVITY

Positivity Research from Barbara Frederickson and others have found the ratio of positive to negative expressions is key to positive outcomes.  They found about 3 to 1 ratio is the tipping point. Below that not much affect may occur.

You can go higher than 3 to 1, but not so high that you become naive and ungrounded, where everything is positive. You must keep your discernment.

So teachers should have 3 positive comments to every 1 negative to students. For partnerships/marriages it’s been found that a high number of positives to negative expressions keeps relationships strong.

So in short, feel good now.


Feeling good is part of manifesting.

You might want to check out our upcoming telecourse on Manifestation. It’s part of our transformational Holistic Coaching and EFT Certification Telecourse, stating February 12. Click here to find out more about this life-changing training.

 

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Is this the #1 Fear?

Some say the #1 fear is that of public speaking, greater than the fear of death. Perhaps the greatest fear, however, is the fear of selling.

Of course, this does not mean everyone suffers from any of these fears. Many are fine with public speaking, death and selling.

Yet let’s examine why so many do get uncomfortable about selling — and why it’s so valuable to overcome this fear.

WHAT IS SELLING?

Selling ends by exchanging a product or service.

But there are many elements that go into selling. It’s also such a common experience, that we may not realize we are “selling” things ourselves daily, if only by persuading and recommending things to others.

Curiously, most are fine making a recommendation to a friend as long as they don’t benefit financially from the recommendation. However, someone else does benefit from wherever you’ve sent your friend with your recommendation.

Hmmm… something is going on here, something to do with money…. More on this in a moment.

If you send a friend to a movie, the theater and movie industry make the money. If you or someone recommends your product or service, you profit financially. If there is a fair exchange, or a good deal, everyone is happy.

SELLING SKILLSETS

Good selling involves these key things: communication and social skills. You need to communicate what you are recommending and develop a relationship with the other person. To cite and oft-heard phrase, people buy from those they know, like and trust.

Perhaps above all, you need to believe in what you are selling or recommending.

SALESMAN TYPES?

Sometimes people figure they are “not a salesman” type.

Daniel Pink in his book To Sell is Human, notes that the evidence shows most people are a combination of introverts and extroverts, rather than being the pure extrovert sales person type. And you don’t need to be a pure extrovert to sell or persuade people.

TAKING CARE OF YOUR BUSINESS

Even if you are a natural caretaker, you still need communication and social skills to succeed.

Whether you are persuading a child to eat healthily or encouraging a person to join your network, you need skills and determination to make your case. This does not mean you need to be a professional salesperson to develop these practical, valuable skills.

EFT TO THE RESCUE

So it sounds like to many it’s fine to recommend. It’s fine to share. But it’s not ok to make money from someone you know, regardless of the value you are offering them.

The Emotional Freedom Techniques can help you clear limitations around “selling” and money. Here are just a few affirmations to use:

“Even though I might get criticized or rejected if I make an offer, I can still love and accept myself.”

“Even though I distrust sales people, I can still get my message out and offer good value to others.”

“Even though I am not a natural sales person, I can still be paid well for my goods and services.”

“Even though I feel that I shouldn’t sell anything to someone I know, I can still love and accept myself.”

 If you can’t sell to your friends, who can you sell to? That leaves strangers or enemies.

BOTTOM LINE

We hope we have shed some light on the often exaggerated fear of selling. It’s said that successful people do what others feel they are too good to do. Or are too afraid to do.

Don’t let fear stop you. You have too much to offer to let fear get in your way. Your dreams and goals of a better life are worth it.

Also if you would like to learn more about manifesting, which can include learning about money, selling and so much more check out our upcoming telecourse on “Manifesting Your Dreams,” part of our Holistic Coaching and EFT Certification. Next course starts February 12.

 

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Want to Become a Holistic Coach?

Have you ever considered becoming a holistic coach?

What if you could profoundly and powerfully help yourself and others, using coaching and breakthrough modalities like EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) and hypnotherapy?

Authors and coaches for the past 20 years, we (Phillip and Jane Mountrose) have trained 100’s of people through our specialized, hands-on programs — like the upcoming Manifesting Your Dreams Telecourse.

It’s part of our unique Holistic Coaching and EFT Certification Telecourse — it starts February 12, 2013.

All you need is a telephone to take the weekly classes — plus they are all recorded if you miss any or want to review them.

To give you details and samples of what our course is like, we invite you to…

WHAT: Want to Be a Holistic Coach with EFT
(Free Teleclass)

WHEN: Wednesday, January 30th, 6pm PT/9pm ET
Enroll for Your FREE Teleclass Below

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First Name


* Double-check the email address you entered above for accuracy to access the call in info for this Free Teleclass

You’ll also receive the monthly “Heart of Success” Updates if you are not already subscribed.

Privacy Assured: Your email address is never shared.

[hilight color=”FFFF00″]Space is limited; must register to attend.[/hilight]

“I wanted to share that I have done most everything Jane and Phillip taught me last year when ‘I felt like my soul was dying’ as Jane puts it — and it has helped immensely! Feel free to put that on your site and in your emails. I will gladly talk to anyone that is still on the fence and tell them that you are the real deal and get results.”
–Dr. Steve Kineret, Orthodontist, BellyFatInferno Specialist
Rocklin, California


Enroll above now for this teleclass about a life-changing Holistic Coaching and EFT Certification telecourse.

This upcoming telecourse is not only the best in hands-on tools and knowledge about Holistic Coaching and EFT. It’s a deep personal, transformational journey as 100’s of people like Dr. Steve above can attest. The telecourse certification program starts again February 12, 2013.

 

 

 

PS, There are a few times in your life that rare opportunities come your way. If you take them, magical, wonderful things can happen to you. This teleclass may open one of those doorways for you.

It may never come again… You’ll never know what you might have missed… unless you attend.

Enroll above for your free teleclass.

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Holistic Coaching & Making the Law of Attraction Work for You — Teleclass

Is the law of attraction working for you or against you?

The law of attraction is always working, and what shows up in your life is a reflection of how you are thinking. It’s wise to learn as much as you can, in a hands-on way, to create the life you want.

Whether you are coaching yourself or others, you need to know exactly how to get the law of attraction to work for you.

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In this Free 70 minute Teleclass, we will show you…

  • 5 mistakes people often make that causes the law of attraction work against them
  • 5 Specific ways to get the law of attraction to work for you on a regular basis
  • How to use the EFT tapping technique and our signature Miracle Reframe to achieve sometimes astonishing results
  • How to use holistic coaching to help yourself and others
  • and more…

 

>>>>>To hear a replay of this teleclass click here.<<<<<<

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WHAT: Holistic Coaching & Making the Law of Attraction Work for You  (Free Teleclass)

WHEN: Wednesday, January 16th, 6pm PT/9pm ET
Enroll Below Now

Enroll for Your FREE Teleclass Below

* Email
First Name


* Double-check the email address you entered above for accuracy to access the call in info for this Free Teleclass

You’ll also receive the monthly “Heart of Success” Updates if you are not already subscribed.

Privacy Assured: Your email address is never shared.

[hilight color=”FFFF00″]Space is limited; must register to attend.[/hilight]

To hear a replay of this teleclass click here.

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What is the Golden Rule?

How do the law of attraction and Golden Rule relate?

What is the Golden Rule?

Throughout history, major religions as well as great thinkers have put forward this key idea:

Christianity: “Whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them.”

Islam: “No one of you is a believer until he loves for his neighbor what he loves for himself.”

Judaism: “What is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow man.”

Buddhism: “Hurt not others with that which pains yourself.”

The Golden Rule is about respecting others. Ultimately, this starts with respecting ourselves. If we are compassionate and caring about ourselves, we can naturally extend that concern to others.

The Law of Attraction

Napoleon Hill, the author of The Laws of Success and Think and Grow Rich, equated the Golden Rule with the law of attraction. In effect, your thoughts and actions get sent back to you.

If you follow the Golden Rule of being kind and considerate to others, others will do the same to you. If you are unfair to others, don’t be surprised if others are resentful and shortchange you.

2 Ways to have the Golden Rule work for you

As Phillip notes in the above video, there are 2 ways to live by the golden rule more easily.

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  • Inclusive thinking.
    Be aware of others when you think and before you act. Even if you disagree with them, be courteous and open to hearing different viewpoints. By living and let living, you create respect and harmony.
  • Use EFT to clear internal blocks.
    The Emotional Freedom tapping techniques (EFT) are often a quick and easy way to address your discomfort with others.

    By tapping on key pressure points while saying an affirmation (like “Even though I think he’s wrong, I can accept myself and others anyway”), you can move on, live your life and live better with others. Some of the conflicts and charge will naturally disappear.

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The golden rule is a wonderful example of the law of attraction. It helps you become aware and self-aware… to help the world be a better place for us all.

 

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The Meaning of Persuasion: Are You Influencing or Manipulating?

What is the meaning of persuasion, a key success secret and way to success? Let us explore this important area that affects so many areas of success.

Are you ever afraid to offer something to others in fear that you are manipulating them? Particularly if the other person has to pay money for it.

We had such concerns about offering our products and services when we started out, and it held us back for a long time. We would like to share what we’ve learned about this important area.

ON THE MOUNTAIN — OR IN THE MUD?

To understand how to genuinely influence people (not manipulate them), you need to have a purpose and mission to help. Eventually you need to translate your dreams and goals into a viable plan for success. Without a direction, you can end up what we call “wallowing in the mud.”

To explain, let’s use a powerful metaphor. You can either be on the mountain top or stuck in the mud way below. To rephrase, you can be heading up the mountain or sinking down toward the mud.

WHAT’S YOUR PERSPECTIVE?

If you clarify your vision and purpose, you feel empowered. It’s as if you are atop a beautiful mountain with a gorgeous 360-degree view.

You experience love and connectedness. Your broad view lets you dream and play bigger. You think, “What (else) could go right?”

But if you are sloshing down in the mud, your view narrows. You feel seperate and alone. You get stuck on “What could go wrong?”

IN WHICH DIRECTION ARE YOU HEADED?

In addition to describing your feeling-state, the mountain-mud metaphor can describe your direction in life. Are we headed up the mountain or drifting down into the mud?

If you are venturing up the next mountain, you are excited about your goals. You find opportunities and resources to go forward. You know you are a creator, in charge of the direction of your life.

If you are drifting toward the mud, you struggle, trying to stay in a comfort zone. On some level, you know you are sinking into mediocrity and complacency. You feel like a victim, out of control.

FINAL THOUGHTS

When you feel good about yourself and your direction, you freely share with others. You want to authentically influence them for the better, knowing they are free to ultimately decide for themselves.

If you are wallowing in the mud of indecision, vacillating from fear to arrogance, from knowing nothing to knowing it all, then you feel uncertain.

If you recommend something from this low vibration, like your products or services, you worry about offending others or being rejected.

The goal is to live on purpose daily. Then you are more present and engaged. You see broadly from the mountain top. You breathe fresh air into your life.

You know your inspiration and direction will help others too.  Then you can truly persuade others and feel good about it. You know the authentic influence of persuasion.

So keep climbing, keep dreaming. Then life’s possibilities open to you regularly, so much so that you will naturally want to share with others.

 

 

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