How to Lead Your Own Life
Learning to lead your own life puts you on what psychologists call “upward spirals,” moving forward with your life.
As a child and teen you may have blindly followed others, which is a normal part of growing up. As a mature, spiritual adult, though, you follow others intentionally. In turn, you find out what you can do to better lead yourself.
1. Find a purpose.
To gain clarity on why you are here, consider the following questions:
What inspires you?
What gifts/talents do you have; what do you enjoy doing?
What puts you in the flow and helps yourself and others?
Contemplating these questions can over time help you go from confusion to clarity in creating a meaningful life. As you realize your unique value, you are then of more value to others, too.
2. Deal with obstacles
What do you need to fulfill your dreams and purpose? To succeed, recognize any obstacles and deal with them. This practical approach will ground your life and keep you spiraling up.
Rather than letting “the universe take care of it,” research shows those who face the obstacles to their goals find ways to accomplish what they desire..
Obstacles can be internal (like fears and doubts) and external (no time or skills). For the internal blocks we use EFT or Spiritual Kinesiology. For external obstacles, you can find resources (prioritizing your schedule, getting a coach, taking a course).
3. Have a plan and take regular action.
What’s your plan for having a more meaningful life? What would you like to accomplish? What is meaningful for you to pursue?
In each moment, you will be doing something. To lead your own life, you want to strategize how to make your next steps good ones.
This planning will include creating positive regular habits (such as exercising, eating well, journaling).
It also includes how to shift bad habits into better ones. For example, too much TV into constructive research; or too many obligations into creating more free time for yourself.
Consider the steps involved to heading in the right direction. It could be about excelling at what you are interested in. A better teacher, researcher, caretaker, healer, performer or leader for instance.
4. Be open and flexible.
Now that you know where you are headed, you want a plan to help you get there. This plan should include what you do when obstacles arise (see the keys above).
Here’s the next suggestion: learn to trust that you, your networks and resources can handle the ongoing uncertainty of life. In truth, none of us knows what will happen next.
Yet with your gifts and your inner and outer resources, you can relax and trust that things are working out, without getting hung up in the grips of anxiety and control.
It’s combining seeming opposites, yin and yang:
Breathe and relax while staying focused.
Be patient and open to opportunities.
Create your next steps to achieving your goal while being flexible and course-correcting.
Remember you can’t know the “how.” Life is too rich and unpredictable to figure it all out. You now are prepared without trying to be perfect before acting. You are a work in progress.
5. Be happy.
With the above four steps in mind — be on purpose, deal with obstacles, follow your plan and be open — just live your life each day as fully as possible.
Your life is an experiment in how to be happy. It’s up to you to craft ways to make that happen. Use the above five keys.
Then you are on an upward spiral of leading your own life, and inspiring others to do so too.