There is a notion that what others think of you is none of your business. This is a partial truth. To understand more, we can put things in context by viewing the bigger picture.
Let’s begin with considering a few things. We are all energy, and all connected. So what affects you, affects me. At the same time, we are still individuals creating our own destiny, our unique life path.
Actually, we’re embodied souls ─ and we are in the process of waking up to that fact. In turn, we can live more fully and help ourselves, others and the whole.
To put things more in perspective, here are three points relating to what others think of you.
Context Point 1: It’s natural to want approval.
Whether you desperately want to be approved of, or say you don’t care what others think of you, there still is an innate need for approval.
Have you consideredthatall the separation we’re seeing in our world may be becoming so extreme it’s making us come together? If we don’t come together, it seems we may fall apart. So coming together will help us not only survive, but grow, regenerate and thrive.
As you know, separation is showing up on many fronts: conflicts in race, politics, environment and more.
Perhaps the solution to these growing rifts isto make the following a priority: to mature spiritually. We automatically get older, but what we are talking about here is becoming wiser.
A Key Principle
Before we offer some how-to specifics, let’s start with a fundamental principle for spiritual growth. We are all spiritual beings – regardless of race, creed or religion – having a human experience.
And we all deserve dignity, no matter how “bad” an actor a person is, however narrow-minded, belligerent or destructive that looks like.
Just as peace begins with me, so spiritual growth begins with me too. This means facing one’s own narrow-mindedness, hostility and destructiveness as well as others’.
To gain clarity in maturing spiritually,here are three comparisons to help move us forward.
What part of life do we so often resist? Uncertainty. In truth, no one knows what the next moment holds, much less the distant future that we are heading toward.
It may be distressing. Or not. To gain insight, let’s examine this important area further.
The brain has an often-outdated reaction to uncertainty, sometimes panicking as if one’s life might be at stake. For ancestors dealing with prowling predators, this came in handy. For most of us now it is a rarely needed impulsive reaction.
Today we are often faced with decisions that we need to make without much information. If you think about it, having little information should make you cautious and intentional, not flighty with a fast reaction.
Here are two common situations facing people: A business person who wants their business to succeed, but has little information on how exactly to proceed. Or a spiritual seeker who gets advice from an authority, and is not sure how to follow up with this new information and way of being. In either case, just being reactive can lead one astray.
So how do you prevent your limbic brain stem from hijacking your more intentional-thinking brain’s cortex?
Let’s start here: be aware of what you can and cannot control. There are some grey areas. But generally, focus on what you can control and let go of trying to control the uncontrollable.
As a motivation, know that you can make wonderful decisions and carve out a great life even amidst tumultuous times.
Keeping in mind a sense of what is within your control, here are four ways to deal with uncertainty:
Have you ever noticed how influenced you can be by what others say? And guess who says the most to you? Yourself, your self-talk. And this self-talk — constant inner chatter — usually goes by unnoticed, like noise in the background.
Some of the messages we send to ourselves we wouldn’t say about our enemies. (“You’re a stupid idiot:”; “You’re a dumb klutz”; “You can’t do anything right.”)
And what you tell yourself, whether you’re listening or not, programs and directs your life. Your self-talk sometimes becomes a self-fulfilling (or unfulfilling) prophecy.
But take heart. We don’t have to be on automatic, which can lead to poor decision making and a general dullness and routineness of life.
It’s good to know you can monitor yourself, listen to yourself and hear the signals in that ongoing self-talk that fills the background of your life.
So how do you do that – bring attention, light and awareness to what you are telling yourself? Here are four important strategies to apply for a greater life.
Words are so much a part of our lives, we rarely examine them. Here are a couple important things to keep in mind.
Our ongoing stream of thoughts contains many negative messages, some reasonable alerts, while many others are false warnings and alarms. We also re-play our favorite negative messages about ourselves and the world.
What’s more, living presents many societal problems that affect us. The media focuses on conflict as well, influencing – often unconsciously –how we describe things.
As a result, it’s easy to use negatively laden words and phrases without realizing the toll they take – on our daily life and the quality of our life
By contrast, using words with awareness can make a positive difference. Let’s explore how words can depress us or uplift us.
Even in these times that try men’s souls, we seek an optimal future. The current challenges can inspire us to rise up and envision a better – a much better —world.
What kind of future do you want to live in? To answer this all-important question, here’s some help. Fill in this sentence:
“I want to live in a more ____________ world.”
Now imagine your personal journey through this awesome future.
The more you can craft an optimal future, the better for you and for the world. Your optimal experiences can reverberate in wonderful, unfathomable ways.
If you are a holistic-minded, heart-centered person, you have certain priorities. You want to make the world a more connected, loving place.
What you contribute, how you live your life, can make the difference. So as you elevate your life, the world around you grows and flourishes too. As you rise to greater vibratory heights, your perspective expands.
The Bright Future Creates the Present
As you seek more freedom, meaning and depth in your future, you integrate this awareness into your present. Hence the future shapes your present.
For your exciting, future life, where do you want more freedom?
What’s often the missing ingredient for love, healing and manifestation? Gratitude.
Gratitude is being thankful and appreciative, and more… Expressing it in your life is a game-changer. Gratitude can bring you up when you’re down. It can create a wonderful view alive, keeping you strong and flexible.
Learning how to express gratitude is a key to a wonderful life. Let it transform you. Here’s how…
Gratitude: The Magic Elixir
Gratitude can get you through the morass of life, in all its uncertainty and confusion. It can help life make more sense.
When you use gratitude, it become a magic elixir for an empowering, transcendent life. It redirects your attention to goodness, even amidst the bad. It gives you a fresh outlook. You connect with others and yourself more. As research shows, you become healthier, happier and can even live longer.
You realize you are fortunate in so many ways. As you focus on your good fortune, it grows into abundance and prosperity, too.
Providing a backdrop for your life, gratitude can help you better handle loss and overwhelm. It provides a way to becoming a more open, humble person.
To make gratitude grow with all its wonderful benefits, you must plant the seeds. How? By practicing it. Include gratitude in your journal and meditation.
Also, gratitude and wonder arise from appreciating nature; the sky, the earth, the water all around us. It just takes an intention to do so.
10 Gratitudes – A Starter List to Express Gratitude
Do you enjoy selling? Well some people do. Many others, particularly holistically minded people, find selling doesn’t come naturally to them. They may have many negative associations about selling. They may even have a strong fear of selling (selling out?).
Yet what’s most important here, looking at the big picture, it becomes apparent that selling is part of the spiritual journey to wholeness. Thus it’s good to face any fears or contradictions around this area of our lives.
What is Selling?
Part of the confusion with selling is that it has two definitions. One has to do with persuading people, the other has to do with transferring goods or services in exchange for money. Each can present challenges, especially when money is involved.