Holistic/Spiritual Resources and Courses

Are You In Control? How to Take Charge of Your Life and Destiny

Do you feel your life is basically in control or out of control? And how much control do you actually have over your life?

These are essential questions. And to respond intelligently, one needs to take into account some important considerations, which we will now examine.

What Areas Can You Control?

Here are some areas that you can control, at least to a certain extent. You can say that you are in control of your…


Such control means you have a realistic sense of what’s involved with the area. You also feel good relating positively to the particular area (with your health, time, energy, etc.).

Negative Control

Some people veer toward being too lax, without boundaries or attention. This lack of awareness can lead to negligence and destruction.

Others can go to the opposite extreme: being overcontrolling. This hypervigilance leads to manipulation. You are on guard and trying to force situations. When you micromanage others, you overstep your bounds and put others on guard against you. If you try to manage everything in your life, which can be perfectionistic, you end up being stressed out. You become a control freak.

To thrive, the body needs to relax and play regularly. Also, spontaneity and humor can break the grip of tending toward too much control. (“I can let go of this. I don’t need to be right. Let things unfold.”)

On the other side, if you are too lax, you need quality control and clearer guidelines and boundaries. (“I will stand up and hold my space and not let him walk all over me and demean me again.”)

Taking Charge of Your Life and Destiny

Sometimes it’s accurate to use the words, “I’m in control of my life.” Psychologists call this an (too many spaces here) “internal locus of control.”

[pullquote align=”left”]I’m taking charge of my life.”
“I direct my life.”
“I am in command of my life.”
“My life has purpose that guides me.” [/pullquote]

Yet at other times, it feels better to use other descriptions:

“I’m taking charge of my life.”
“I direct my life.”
“I am in command of my life.”
“My life has purpose that guides me.”

Part of figuring out how much you direct your life is taking into account things outside your control, or that you can only influence. These include the weather, natural disasters, geopolitical events and loss of a loved one.

Regardless, you can take charge of how you respond. You can control your thoughts, feelings and actions.

Following Your Heart

When you know how to listen and follow your heart, things come together. This includes awakening your soul’s guidance.  If you proceed in this direction, you will experience the ultimate paradigm shift, the subject of our new book.

Instead of being used up by life, you will use your life. You will deal with whatever you encounter.

In the process, you become a creative force, and trust the universe to mysteriously provide in the process. You take a grounded and inspirational approach to living. You follow your excitement and then do your part, to play a bigger part.

Taking command means using your will and imagination, which leads to more creativity and discoveries about yourself and who you are becoming. Your life is being used for something bigger. You are using your talents and skills to make a difference.

Final Thoughts on Taking Charge of Your Life

Control then includes taking things in stride, the ups and downs, the highs and lows of life. Then you can feel you are in charge of your destiny, even if the externals don’t yet reflect much progress. You cope, adapt and use change to help you stay on track. You course correct and sometimes find new directions. No need to manipulate, just get creative.

Along the way, at a certain point, you definitely find your purpose and set goals.

Be in control of what you can, taking charge of your life, which creates a wonderful destiny. Your destination(s) are not yet known, nor can they be ahead of time. Yet you still are in control of where you are going, taking the next step, which sometimes appears right before you take it, seemingly out of nowhere.

With the right attitude, you can have the right kind of control. You can be master of your fate and deal with what comes your way. You are here for a reason – remember that.